You have repeatedly said: “I can’t keep my temper.” “I have to speak.” You lack a meek, humble spirit. Self is all alive, and you stand guard continually to preserve it from mortification or insult. Says the apostle: “For ye are dead, and your life is hid with Christ in God.” Colossians 3:3. Those who are dead to self will not feel so readily and will not be prepared to resist everything which may irritate. Dead men cannot feel. You are not dead. If you were, and your life were hid in Christ, a thousand things which you now notice, and which afflict you, would be passed by as unworthy of notice; you would then be grasping the eternal and would be above the petty trials of this life. (2T 425.1) MC VC